SSD

By tframeli

1 min read

I'm so frustrated with everything right now.

Starting the process of SSD

I was diagnosed with MS when I was 27. I started to have major symptoms almost 3 years ago. I have worked all of my life, since 10 years when my dad past away. I'm now 55 and started the process of SSD on May 23rd, 2017. I was let go from my employer and I got another job and they let me go. My last 3 employers just said it was not working out. I was a Senior Loan Processor. 30 plus years.

Waiting for my fate to be decided

Now that I can't work, the only income is from my husband. We had to use his employer's health insurance and had to do the high deductible so that we could pay our bills. We ended up going into bankruptcy and discharged in 2018. I finally had my hearing on October 8, 2019. The judge was very mean, sarcastic, and had no compassion for me at all! I have been waiting for him to decide on my fate.

Relying on my husband's short-term disability

In the meantime, my husband just had 3 surgeries this month and now we need to rely on his short-term disability which, it is very hard for me to understand what needs to be done. I'm a mess to say the least. The only thing we have is our home.

So discouraged

What I'm very upset about is that one of my friend's sisters was diagnosed with MS and she applied for SSD and was approved 1st time. I'm feeling discouraged because I have done everything right. I'm so tired of hearing about what I'm supposed to do now and be patient and soon it will be good. I'm to the point that I am thinking about just quitting everything! Everyone says that God does not give you more than you can handle, well I think he has...

I just needed to have someone listen that knows what I m feeling.

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carrierodman Member
I've been denied 5 times. Last one was with a lawyer. Judge was rude and they just don't care. They act like it's coming out if their pocket! Trying again for SSDI this month.
1. tess0714 Member
 I believe they don’t care because they don’t get it. They’re not empathic. Judges are supposed to be impartial, unbiased and look at they do not.
lind Member
I am here to tell you I am going through the same thing as you are at this point. I knew there was something wrong with me when I couldn't focus. This has been going on for over 10 years I've ruined a relationship and can't hold down a job because no one has diagnosed me. I have had three MRIs and they show lesions and my spine. I filed for disability I live by myself and I really don't have family or friends they are all deceased. I have become a loner.
1. tess0714 Member
 Join support groups...volunteer. Being alone is not good or healthy.
2. colette4 Member
 volunteering and joining a support group is fine if one has access to a car or is able to drive.
geauxstone Member
I hear your frustration and empathize completely. I have been waiting on the judge from my hearing October to make a decision in my case. It is along and frustrating process and I don’t know what else that can be done. As long as you made sure that SSD had all your current medical records, I don’t know what else you can do either. The government does not move with alacrity and sometimes it feels as if “they” would rather we just go away. By the way, people constantly misquote that scripture. It says God will not allow us to be tempted with more than we can resist. It doesn’t say anything about more than we can handle.
1. tess0714 Member
 Tomato...tomotow.
alexanderkim77 Member
Whatever you do - don't give up. We were fortunate to have a previous SSDI worker assist with our application and we were approved the first time. It's all in the way the paperwork, documents, timeline and proof is submitted. Press to understand the reasoning on why it was denied to help the process next time and having a Neurologist/MRI/Spinal tap medical record will help as well. Don't focus on your condition causing loss of work but your condition itself.
1. tess0714 Member
 You are right. Also, if your penmanship is impeccable...get sloppy.
artsyannie Member
I applied in june 2002. Diagnosed by symptoms. MRI/spinal tap etc., were inconclusive. Lost much of my vision in short time. At 1st appt. with social security, the rep told me that 70% of applicants are automatically denied by random selection. He said that that selection has nothing to do with whats on the application. Well, i was of the lucky 30% and started receiving checks the following march. Keep at it, though. Get a lawyer.
oliviaj Member
What is SSD? It would help to know because different countries use different language.
1. trishaholm Member
 Social Security disability
trishaholm Member
I'm going through the same as you..I was just got diagnosed with ms and haven't been able to work my husband has ssd and trying to make it has been awful. I've been turned down once and now I'm going through an appeal and it's going slow as hell and we're about to be on the street
1. tess0714 Member
 I was approved in 2011 about one year after being dxd with MS. I did it on my own with my Neuro’s support. Also had my primary’s support. Collected all med records, labs, etc... they put me through psychological, nerve resting, had my adult child complete a lengthy questionnaire. This all took about a year. I do believe that they were hoping I would get disgusted and quit. I did not. Had no other option. Dr said I couldn’t work anymore. If you must...find yourself a lawyer who specializes in auto-immune diseases/MS and they can help. Keep preserving. Don’t quit. You put in this money all your life. When you need it, they don’t want to give it back. The govt are stingy bulleys.
bostonrobin Member
Hi Everyone! I was diagnosed in 2003 at age 42. Luckily I qualified for SSD the first time I applied. The best advice I was given before I applied was to describe your symptoms and problems on their worst day ever. I was on Copaxone for ten years, which worked very well. Until I had allergic reactions to it and had to try something else. While on Copaxone I was doing well enough that I took a part-time job that was just under the SSD income limit. Having a job made me feel like I was almost back to normal. Using my brain and skills made me feel like I was productive and not out of touch with the "real world." However, before I knew it, the part-time job grew from 10-15 hours a week to an average of 20-25 hours a week, which put me over the SSD income limit. Stupidly, my anxiety and subsequent depression over a reduction or possibly elimination of my SSD income kept me from reporting my increase in work hours and income. To make a long story shorter, SSD contacted me after three or four years, stopped my monthly deposits and -- what is most overwhelming -- has demanded that I repay the money I received in those three years. So now I don't receive SSD payments, make less money than if I had stayed on SSD in the first place and now they want me to pay them $50,000+! As for my MS status in the last five years, I have not found a medicine as effective as Copaxone. Therefore, I am increasingly more affected by MS symptoms at the age of about-to-be 59. Of course, I'm exhausted even more than ever. My energy level is very low most days. My depression and anxiety have increased ten-fold. Moreover, I've noticed a decline in my brain function. I'm even more forgetful and tired than ever which affects my job performance. I don't really want to quit my job, as the hours are flexible and keeps my mind occupied. However, I feel like I may be let go if my mental abilities decline even further. If that happens, I am without SSD payments, without a job and owe SSD over $50,000. I've been married for 33 years. My husband makes a decent income that pays for the majority of our bills and is generally supportive overall. However, I feel enormous guilt for now owing a huge amount of money to the government when we should be planning his retirement. That guilt and anxiety also negatively affect my psychological problems, of course. I am now mentally paralyzed by the thought of how am I going to get myself out of this mess. I have been wishing lately that I never took this job because it has caused big financial problems. More so, I also feel like the stress from the job is affecting me physically and emotionally as well. There are deadlines that I have to meet, and have faltered on those lately too. If I am fired or quit, I will be devastated in so many ways. I am now stuck between a rock and a hard place in many ways. Honestly, I actually didn't come here to layout my problems, but here we are. Now under the Trump administration, I feel like I have no chance of ever becoming eligible for SSD ever again. See the following article: <a href='https://www.inquirer.com/news/social-security-ssi-ssdi-trump-administration-disability-20191212.html' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer ugc'>https://www.inquirer.com/news/social-security-ssi-ssdi-trump-administration-disability-20191212.html</a> I hate to be a downer, but I thought people who see my comments will learn something to help them deal with whatever they are going through. Happy Holidays to you all! Robin
1. bostonrobin Member
 As I reread the first paragraph, I realize that I stated the wrong information. I was diagnosed in 2005 at age 44. This mistake is a prime example of how my mental abilities are being affected. Also, I forgot to mention that I am now having tremors/shaking in my hands which affects my handwriting. The doctor isn't sure if it's MS related or maybe even something else. However, time and an MRI will tell. I'm sorry for my long tale, but it all flowed very easily tonight. Again, Happy Holidays to you all!
2. Janus Galante Moderator
 Oh my goodness Robin, PLEASE don't apologize for your posts! You are correct in your thinking that they might just be able to help others....I'm so thankful that you decided to share this very well and clearly written reply of your experiences! Do you and your husband have any resources at all that may be able to lead you in a helpful direction?? I truly empathize with your situation, and am hoping that you can find answers both with the ssd and with finding a medication that can effectively take the place of the Copaxone! Please keep us posted...!! Janus
temagami Member
Please check out this link <a href='https://www.disabilitysecrets.com/resources/social-security-disability/negotiating-a-repayment-plan-a' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer ugc'>https://www.disabilitysecrets.com/resources/social-security-disability/negotiating-a-repayment-plan-a</a> as it explains the various scenarios for your situation. Before you get thoroughly defeated, be sure to read the entire article as it goes through many possibilities. It appears that you would be best off dropping your hours below the max. allowed by SSDI so that you can qualify for SSDI and then negotiate a repayment plan. Your house does NOT count as an asset when determining your ability to pay it back and there are cases where they will allow for 60-80% of the pay back with more advantageous outcomes to you if you can pay back a lump sum.
not found
A year and six months since i had to leave my job (seemed like a better option than getting fired). I've been paying into the system since i was 14 and now I'm stuck in this purgatory, lawyered up even; with no health insurance now. Insult to injury- every day...