Out of Nowhere in 1993

In 1993 I was 30 years old, working on a career in a field I had been engaged in for 10 years. Then bam, my right arm went numb. I went to the doctor and was immediately sent to see a neurologist. Long story short, I was diagnosed with MS. One piece of valuable advice I was given; don't go trying to find a bunch of info on MS.

For 35 years, everything seemed ok

75% of people live a normal life. I took that and ran. I returned to work and worked like someone who had no time to waste. I was very successful for 35 years, after a confrontation with my manager, bam, another attack. This one was different. It was affecting my mental abilities. I was 55, and had worked my body hard. Long story short, my neurologist told me I could not go back to work, any kind of work, period. This was 2018.

I experienced a lot of loss and grieving

In that year my dear mother who was a big part of my life, passed away I was her caretaker and by her side when she passed, 2019 my younger brother committed suicide, 2020 my beloved older brother passed away. I was his caretaker and by his side when he passed. He was the last of my immediate family. My father died in 1999. I swam in a sea of darkness for a long time. In 2023 I have a much-improved outlook.

The important lessons I learned

What I learned about myself is my well of positivity is deep. Through meditation and thought, my body can be responsive. I've learned how important spirituality is in recovering what you can of your old self and seeing a new self. I've learned how to - be still- and when I need to let my body rest and catch up with my mind. I've learned I have the strength of a giant. I've learned if my mind is open, I can see the diamonds God shows me every morning.