So glad we have this forum.
I’m 81, a widow of 3yrs, and my kids want me to move from my townhome to a home next door to my daughter. They say it’s for my own good. I really love my townhome and my MS is slow progressive type. Balance the biggest issue. I hope I’ll b happy don’t know why I’m texting this. But I did. Thanks for listening to my venting
Thank you for sharing your feelings with us! And it's okay to vent here, we welcome it! It’s clear your kids care about you deeply and want what’s best for you, but it’s also important for you to feel heard and comfortable with any decisions about where you live. It’s okay to take your time to weigh what’s best for you—both in terms of your happiness and health. Maybe having an open conversation with your kids about your feelings and exploring ways to address their concerns without losing what you love could help. Whatever you decide, it’s your journey, and it’s okay to prioritize what brings you peace and joy. Thank you for sharing—I hope it brought you a little relief. 🧡 -Latoya (Team Member) thank you for sharing!
I'm going to take the role of the adult child momentarily...my Mom is a widow of two years now, and her health is not great. She does not have MS, but she does have several other issues including balance and falls. She just turned 70, but she's had health troubles for many years. And I...am a bit alpha, I want to control situations when I can. And my mom lives 2800 miles away, literally on the other coast of the country.
It was very hard for me, knowing that I could help, and I could be a part of her medical advocation, and I have so much medical knowledge, and my Mom not wanting to move. As a child, knowing that I have the ability to help, it really devastated me that she didn't want it... at the beginning. But I realized that...no matter what she is facing she is still the same woman I grew up knowing.
I feel that you should follow your own intuition, and your desire, you have earned it. And I believe that your children want what is best for you, and they can accept your decision, whatever it may be.
I am my mom's power of attorney. I didn't take the role lightly. And my siblings wanted me to use that to force her to move a year ago. I chose to trust her, and I will continue to.
Now, as a person who is dealing with diminishing physical capabilities myself, I support you. And I wish the very best for you. Please, vent to us. You need an outlet, and this community is wonderful. I'm sending you love and respect 💜Your story, I did relate to. My husband and I live in a house and he would probably like to move to a smaller place maybe near one of our 5 adult children maybe in a warmer climate. However, I am the one who does not want to move. I do have MS. I was 57 when I found out 18 yrs.ago (i am 75+ now.) Before the day when I woke up with Transverse Myelitis probably due to MS, My younger daughter had also been diagnosed with MS 3 yrs prior. I had no idea I had MS before that. I thought I was living a rather “normal” life. The thought of finding a place to live elsewhere, packing up the house is overwhelming to me. It may also be a little selfish, I know, but I was an only child who learned most of my growing up years to make my own decisions. We have 5 adult children, two with their own children but in different places from California to Florida to Michigan. Some come to visit in the summer and we have the room for the grandchildren to stay and play. I don’t know what the future will bring. Will I remain healthy? Will I need help? Will my husband be able to attend to me? Will I be able to attend to him if need be? Do I have the patience to live near or with my adult children? I have less patience in general lately, so I don’t know at this point. No doubt I have slowed down a bit in the last year. Who knows? Maybe I’ll change my mind one day and pack up and move, but just now now. thank you for sharing! I can relate relate... I grew up as an individual, I started taking care of my siblings when I was still very young, so I have always been reliant on only myself, very decisive when the time calls for it, stubborn sometimes to a fault, and definitely less patience as I grow. (I don't get older, I just grow wiser...)
And you're very right, the future is uncertain. It's uncertain for all of us, MS or not. Why make a change to a situation you're happy with on uncertainty.
I haven't always made the best decisions, and certainly haven't always made the correct decisions, but I stand by every choice and if it wasn't the best grow a little wiser.
You do you! 💜💜
THank you,I just needed someone to listen. It’s a done deal with move on January 6. Just gotta shoe myself out of this slump, mayb it’s the holiday blues Merry Christmas to all.
we're wishing you the best, and glad that you're part of this community. Please keep us posted on how you're doing, if you feel comfortable doing so.
Best
Alene (team member)
Hi Cebshad.
My wife and I recently took in my mother in law who is 83 and has fallen far to many times. It broke out hearts to have her do this. Sell her home, her car and store all her belongings. My wife has secondary progressive MS. And now we are caring for her Mom. It's a much different situation than yours. But I'm sure the reasons you're children have presented to you are very similar and it because you are loved that they are concerned.
It's a new chapter in your life that emotionally won't be easy. Hopefully knowing you are so loved by your kids makes the change less stressful. Having MS is a daunting challenge at any stage of life, having a family that cares,loves and supports you is truly a blessing.
Good luck with the move and the Best of Health to you and your family in the coming New Year.thanks for joining the conversation and sharing your perspective and encouragement. It's so helpful to have that from our community here, when we go through challenging times.
Best
Alene (team member)
